My sweet Tara. You have just accomplished something truly wonderful and your family and friends are here to celebrate with you.
I want to share some thoughts with you. A few paragraphs that I am unreasonable enough to presume you will internalize and live by. Little do they know, out there in the audience, that this is already you…
It turns out that there are four tools that, when practiced, reliably give access to the realm of happenings that we cannot explain with our current way of understanding reality and force us to reinterpret life. These tools give us access to the miraculous. You have already demonstrated your familiarity with of them on numerous occasions and I will memorialize them now:
1) Live a life of integrity. Integrity is not being good, not being admirable, not meaning what you say and not even always keeping your word. Integrity is honoring your word. Honoring your word means treating your words with deep respect. Nobody can give you integrity. With integrity, you can make promises you don’t know how to keep. This will give you access to the miraculous.
2 ) Be “not deserving.” This does not mean unworthy; it’s simply being neither deserving nor un-deserving but rather a space where miracles can happen and deserving plays no role at all.
3) The future you are living into gives you being in the present. What you know about yourself and your life comes solely from the past and is useful for survival - but is worthless for miracles. The past is not where you are; the past has nothing to do with who you are. Who you are in the present is given by the future you are living into.
4) The future exists as anything is possible. Even what you are sure (or absolutely certain) is impossible, is possible. The future exists as pure possibility – a blank canvas, a realm of possibility in which you can create a possibility. There is no such thing as a right possibility or a wrong possibility. Create a possibility, a future that asks you to be a bigger person than you think you are. Create a future that moves you, touches you, and inspires you. In fact, look for a future – a possibility – that wants you! Create that and take a stand the future that you create.
Mom and I created this weekend as a possibility almost 14 years ago. It was worth the wait!
Love, Daddy
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Daddy's Acknowledgement of Emily on the Occasion of her Bat Mitzvah (May 2007)
Emily,
Everything about you has surpassed my expectations, even your birthday. You see, I saw Mom’s ultrasound, and for months, I was certain you were a boy. Ever since then, you have had me securely wrapped around your little finger.
I do a lot of public speaking but collecting my thoughts for today was not easy. Not because I don’t have anything to say. Not because there isn’t anything I want to tell you in front of all these people; but because there is so much to tell you.
I’ve taken great joy in watching you accomplish the milestones in a child’s life. And I am especially proud of what you have accomplished today. I hold you to a high standard and I love watching you strive to do your best.
It’s important to make note of the fact that you are one of very few people to have actually written a torah, the very one from which you read, in fact.
The Torah teaches it is the responsibility of each Jew to personally write a Sefer Torah. We read in Deuteronomy: “Write for Yourselves this Song, and Teach it to the Children of Israel.” Our sages interpret this as the 613th mitzvah - the final commandment.
A Sefer Torah contains 304,805 letters and each letter can be said to complete the Torah. Tradition tells us that one who writes even a single letter in a Torah, or causes one to be written through their support, fulfills this commandment.
Of those fortunate enough to fulfill this commandment, fewer still read from that particular scroll on the occasion of their Bat Mitzvah service. What an extraordinary thing!
I would like to tell you a few things that I think are important for you to remember, not necessarily for today, but things worth considering at times in your life when you need to make a choice or a decision.
Look forward to your future but don’t skip the present. Do fulfilling things. Aspire to be fondly remembered and admired by your family and true friends. Keep in mind: insight is better than rigor.
Most importantly, don’t confuse your goals with your strategy. That is to say, make sure the things you want to achieve ultimately, are within the reach of the strategies you select to pursue them. Don’t settle. Don’t be afraid of change.
Hearing these words for the first time in the midst of the excitement of your Bat Mitzvah service may hold little meaning, but I am hopeful you will keep this note from me and read it from time to time. I believe the words will hold a different meaning for you at the different stages of your life and in the context of your experience.
I’m very proud of you today, again, since you give me cause to be proud of you often. Keep up the good work. I love you.
Daddy
Everything about you has surpassed my expectations, even your birthday. You see, I saw Mom’s ultrasound, and for months, I was certain you were a boy. Ever since then, you have had me securely wrapped around your little finger.
I do a lot of public speaking but collecting my thoughts for today was not easy. Not because I don’t have anything to say. Not because there isn’t anything I want to tell you in front of all these people; but because there is so much to tell you.
I’ve taken great joy in watching you accomplish the milestones in a child’s life. And I am especially proud of what you have accomplished today. I hold you to a high standard and I love watching you strive to do your best.
It’s important to make note of the fact that you are one of very few people to have actually written a torah, the very one from which you read, in fact.
The Torah teaches it is the responsibility of each Jew to personally write a Sefer Torah. We read in Deuteronomy: “Write for Yourselves this Song, and Teach it to the Children of Israel.” Our sages interpret this as the 613th mitzvah - the final commandment.
A Sefer Torah contains 304,805 letters and each letter can be said to complete the Torah. Tradition tells us that one who writes even a single letter in a Torah, or causes one to be written through their support, fulfills this commandment.
Of those fortunate enough to fulfill this commandment, fewer still read from that particular scroll on the occasion of their Bat Mitzvah service. What an extraordinary thing!
I would like to tell you a few things that I think are important for you to remember, not necessarily for today, but things worth considering at times in your life when you need to make a choice or a decision.
Look forward to your future but don’t skip the present. Do fulfilling things. Aspire to be fondly remembered and admired by your family and true friends. Keep in mind: insight is better than rigor.
Most importantly, don’t confuse your goals with your strategy. That is to say, make sure the things you want to achieve ultimately, are within the reach of the strategies you select to pursue them. Don’t settle. Don’t be afraid of change.
Hearing these words for the first time in the midst of the excitement of your Bat Mitzvah service may hold little meaning, but I am hopeful you will keep this note from me and read it from time to time. I believe the words will hold a different meaning for you at the different stages of your life and in the context of your experience.
I’m very proud of you today, again, since you give me cause to be proud of you often. Keep up the good work. I love you.
Daddy
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
All this abundance is NO GOOD... unless there is someone to accept it
Not only do I believe but I have experienced the universe conspiring to my happiness when I get out of my own way.
For several years, I have been aware of this and for several months, I have been aware that I wasn't the only one who was aware of it and for several days I have been writing this entry in my head...
But in the last 2 days, everything came together for me and it crystallized around a sad event in my friend, Amanda's life and her response to it.
Amanda experienced the need for OTHERS to give, therefore someone else needed to receive!
This critical element is now so obvious to me and it occurs to me that it is so invisible to many others.
In my life I see countless acts of kindness and generosity. I see the delight in the face and eyes of the giver (THE GIVER!) as their act of grace is authentically appreciated.
Most people like to be the giver and eschew the role of receiver. I understand this and I see the fallacy of this was of thinking. It's like so many other things that we intuitively understand: like exhaling after inhaling, for example.
Giving only exists when there is a recipient.
Being a clearing for a gift of grace in the absence of deserving or non-deserving, is where miracles show up.
Think about it. Chime in.
MSS
For several years, I have been aware of this and for several months, I have been aware that I wasn't the only one who was aware of it and for several days I have been writing this entry in my head...
But in the last 2 days, everything came together for me and it crystallized around a sad event in my friend, Amanda's life and her response to it.
Amanda experienced the need for OTHERS to give, therefore someone else needed to receive!
This critical element is now so obvious to me and it occurs to me that it is so invisible to many others.
In my life I see countless acts of kindness and generosity. I see the delight in the face and eyes of the giver (THE GIVER!) as their act of grace is authentically appreciated.
Most people like to be the giver and eschew the role of receiver. I understand this and I see the fallacy of this was of thinking. It's like so many other things that we intuitively understand: like exhaling after inhaling, for example.
Giving only exists when there is a recipient.
Being a clearing for a gift of grace in the absence of deserving or non-deserving, is where miracles show up.
Think about it. Chime in.
MSS
Monday, May 4, 2009
Affirmation
Dear God...
I have just returned from a 3 day conference called "I Can Do It!"
I really came away with some fabulous insights into happiness, productivity, healing, spirituality, and community. I look forward to sharing with you, here, and giving credit where credit is due...
I heard this in the seminar by Robert Holden, Ph.D. It's perfect!
I intend to use this and share it with everyone. Won't you join me?
Watch for more from my experience at this event...
MSS
I have just returned from a 3 day conference called "I Can Do It!"
I really came away with some fabulous insights into happiness, productivity, healing, spirituality, and community. I look forward to sharing with you, here, and giving credit where credit is due...
I heard this in the seminar by Robert Holden, Ph.D. It's perfect!
Dear God,
I declare today a day of Amnesty in which I gratefully volunteer to hand in all of my resentments and grievances to You. Please help me to handle well, all of the peace that must inevitably follow.
Amen.
I intend to use this and share it with everyone. Won't you join me?
Watch for more from my experience at this event...
MSS
Sunday, May 3, 2009
The First Step
A Journey of a Thousand Miles
Begins with a single step.
(Tao, 64)
From The Tao of Personal Leadership (Diane Dreher) 1996:
MSS
From The Tao of Personal Leadership (Diane Dreher) 1996:
The decision to self-actualize, to become more of what we are, generally begins with a sense of restlessness. The call to leadership comes to us at different times, in different ways. It may be a life-changing event or a subtle longing, a move, a promotion, or an inner need. But the result is inevitable: We cannot stay as we have been. We must move on.I'm on my way. "Safe" is the new "Risky". Speak up, stand up, let's go!
MSS
Saturday, May 2, 2009
In Search of Excellence - Not Perfection
I'm Learning
I am in a constant state of personal development but sometimes I am more committed than at other times. It has generally been true that I am significantly more effective when I consistently pursuing my personal development.
I acknowledge that I will occasionally get caught up in "Looking Good" even though I know that one cannot look good and get better at the same time.
In fact, this is an ancient lesson:
I am in a constant state of personal development but sometimes I am more committed than at other times. It has generally been true that I am significantly more effective when I consistently pursuing my personal development.
I acknowledge that I will occasionally get caught up in "Looking Good" even though I know that one cannot look good and get better at the same time.
In fact, this is an ancient lesson:
Tao leaders, unaware of their virtue
Are truly virtuous.
The lesser person tries hard to look good
And is therefore not virtuous.
(Tao, 38)
It occurs to me that high performance individuals habituate to our strengths and accomplishments that are obvious to our peers and we focus instead, on the tiny details that occur to us as deficiencies. Under the microscope of our consciousness, we over emphasize these faults rather than appreciate them as opportunities.
It is important to be honest about opportunities for improvement and it's unrealistic to expect perfection. The Tao tells us that perfection is not natural. What is natural is to keep on growing.
I'm learning. A little more "excellent" is all I want. What are you open to?
MSS
It occurs to me that high performance individuals habituate to our strengths and accomplishments that are obvious to our peers and we focus instead, on the tiny details that occur to us as deficiencies. Under the microscope of our consciousness, we over emphasize these faults rather than appreciate them as opportunities.
It is important to be honest about opportunities for improvement and it's unrealistic to expect perfection. The Tao tells us that perfection is not natural. What is natural is to keep on growing.
I'm learning. A little more "excellent" is all I want. What are you open to?
MSS
Friday, May 1, 2009
Man, I am relieved!
La Habra High School, Heritage of the Americas, Awards Banquet
I wasn't worried, but if I was, I'm not anymore. I had the pleasure of attending an awards banquet for the College-prep Magnet Program at La Habra High School.
I saw, firsthand, college-bound high school seniors and underclassmen (and women) just as good if not better, ready and eager to fill their places. I can tell you that if these young people are representative of their peers across the country and across the world, we're in good hands...if we don't screw it up too bad.
It makes me wonder what our world's leaders were like when they were high school seniors.
I saw athletes, writers, musicians, students talented in science and math, award winning students, academic and athletic-scholarship-winning students.
I hope the entrepreneurs are represented as strongly (even if not recognized by the existing acknowledgment system).
What will become of most of these talented people? They'll vie for jobs, of course. Who will be the most significant (on the world stage, not among their families)? I predict it will be the politicians and the entrepreneurs.
I think I will look into a way to predict who will be the politicians and the entrepreneurs when they are in high school. Then I'll invest in them!
What happened to your entrepreneurial spirit? If you could reawaken it, would you? Would you re-invent the wheel or stand on the shoulders of giants and be the reason a good-thing becomes great?
MSS
I wasn't worried, but if I was, I'm not anymore. I had the pleasure of attending an awards banquet for the College-prep Magnet Program at La Habra High School.
I saw, firsthand, college-bound high school seniors and underclassmen (and women) just as good if not better, ready and eager to fill their places. I can tell you that if these young people are representative of their peers across the country and across the world, we're in good hands...if we don't screw it up too bad.
It makes me wonder what our world's leaders were like when they were high school seniors.
I saw athletes, writers, musicians, students talented in science and math, award winning students, academic and athletic-scholarship-winning students.
I hope the entrepreneurs are represented as strongly (even if not recognized by the existing acknowledgment system).
What will become of most of these talented people? They'll vie for jobs, of course. Who will be the most significant (on the world stage, not among their families)? I predict it will be the politicians and the entrepreneurs.
I think I will look into a way to predict who will be the politicians and the entrepreneurs when they are in high school. Then I'll invest in them!
What happened to your entrepreneurial spirit? If you could reawaken it, would you? Would you re-invent the wheel or stand on the shoulders of giants and be the reason a good-thing becomes great?
MSS
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